Before I studied Life Coaching, I would compare my schedule with other working Mums and wonder how they found the time to attend a Yoga class or train for a running event four times a week, when I couldn’t manage to get my sorry butt off the couch after a hectic week of…well…life!
The thought of setting a goal and making it happen, made my life feel instantly busier.
I couldn’t possibly add any more to my day because I’d be completely burnt out or worse, I’d fail before I’d even started and that would mean I didn’t achieve something else I wanted to do.
Who needed that embarrassment on their public record?
Here’s the thing, it wasn’t until I learned I was going about goal setting the hard way, that the easier and much more pleasant way of goal setting appeared before me.
The secret sauce lies in knowing what genuinely matters to me, my family and our life.
It’s about understanding what’s important to me (and therefore my kids) in the day-to-day, in order to let go of what’s not important. You know all that stuff taking up your time and valuable energy.
If you feel like setting goals is just another failure waiting to happen, here’s what you need to do BEFORE you can set heart-driven goals, so you’re completely prepared to make them happen:
1: Understand what your goal means to you and why it’s important
You will never find the motivation to achieve your goal if you don’t understand why it’s important to you in the first place. No, this isn’t a “because my Doctor told me to get fit” reason, it’s a deep dive, hand on your heart belief. It’s knowing your ‘why’ that will propel you forward, not because it sounds good or someone else is doing it.
2: Be aware of everything you’re afraid of first
When I first launched an online business I dived two feet first and asked questions later. What I should’ve done was get to know those little fears I keep hidden inside so I could’ve been aware of them instead of running in the other direction. For example, who knew as a former Communications Manager that I would have a fear of talking about myself to media? Yes I can PR the s*#t out of a brand or company until the cows come home, but when I have to talk about myself to promote the biz…. Crickets! Not exactly a good recipe for success.
3: Identify what you need to leave behind
In order to move forward you have to let something go. You’re not the same woman you were 5, 10 , 15 years ago and nor should you be. What doesn’t serve you anymore? Perhaps is a mindset, negative people, or different areas of your life e.g. finances, relationships, health etc… You will know intuitively what it is and you know it’s time to let it go in order to cultivate your best life.
4: Give yourself permission to fail (hint: you can never really fail)
What is the absolute worst thing in the world that could happen if you failed? Let’s imagine you set your sights on achieving your goal and you’re half way through but… dah – dah – dah… the world ends. OH NO!!
a) has the world really ended?
b) is this just a mind game keeping you stuck from moving forward?
c) is the thought of failing triggering something you’re really afraid of (#2) e.g. being seen, being heard, not being good enough etc…
At the end of the day when you’re 85 years old and you’ve had a spectacular life because you got out of your own way to make stuff happen, will you care that you ‘failed’? It’s probably the story of your failure that everyone wants to hear.
5: Decide whether the effort is worth it, or if you’re happy to stay stagnant
It’s one of the most important decisions you’ll ever make, but it’s the hardest one. Do you genuinely believe you could regret not giving it a go when you had the chance? Therein lies your answer and the foundation on which to build the rest of your life.
If you’re ready to stop making reasons, start getting results with step by step guidance with our new free digital download, Project Me Playbook.